


Why do(n't) you love me?

by brainstorm



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, niam AU, this is just them being kind of 'domestic', this is old and mostly just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-06
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-23 19:22:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1576691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brainstorm/pseuds/brainstorm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall's too worried thinking Liam doesn't love him anymore that he's missed all the signs he's given him instead of saying the words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why do(n't) you love me?

**Author's Note:**

> I just found this lying around on my computer and it's really old but I thought I should post it. It's not long and it's not that good either I think. Whatever, I'm working on stuff, I didn't forget about you! (in case someone was wondering)

It’s been a while, twenty seven months, which means two years and three months to be exact, since Liam and Niall decided to make their relationship official. It took them quite some time at the beginning, despite all their friends’ comments to just get over it with. But they were too shy or embarrassed or claimed that couldn’t find the right time to ask the other, until Liam had finally worked up some courage to ask Niall to actually be his boyfriend after dating for almost six long months.

And that bring us to today. Don’t get him wrong, Niall loved Liam. He loved him with all his heart, he loved him so much he thought his heart would explode sometimes. But something was off, or at least that’s what he thought. He was worried Liam didn’t love him anymore, and if that was true, then he couldn’t handle that, he’d rather be dead than have Liam breaking up with him.

Why does he think that, you ask? Well, Liam just didn’t tell him he loved him anymore. He never even said “me too” anymore. You might think he was overreacting, that after so long together, he would be okay. But it doesn’t matter how long they’d been a couple, Niall still need reassurance, he had always been very insecure at the beginning of their relationship until Liam had sat him down and told him to stop being so stubborn, because he actually loved him and was never going to leave him. Well, he doubted that right now. It’s been a while since he head Liam say those words to him.

He sighed as he looked at the clock, realizing that he had spent about an hour mopping around. And mopping around _what_ to be exact? Liam was still his.

He stood up and went into his kitchen to try and decide something for dinner as Liam was due to be there soon. Well, pasta will have to do because Liam loves pasta, right? Also, because that’s the only thing in his kitchen right now and he was too lazy to go out to buy something. _‘See, this is probably why he doesn’t love you anymore, Niall, you don’t even try anymore’_ Niall thought to himself and shook his head, putting the pasta back in its place, before grabbing the coat that hanged by the door, his keys and wallet to go to the grocery shop.

He was met by a solid body on his way out and huffed an “ow!” that made him look up to be met by brown eyes and a soft smile.

“Where are you going?” Liam asked, a slight frown on his face but the smile didn’t leave.

“I was going to buy some food, I only got pasta.” Niall explained.

“Pasta is fine, babe.” Liam said, resting his hand on the small of Niall’s back and walking him inside the flat again. “You know it’s my favorite, why would you want to buy something else? Unless you don’t want pasta, I mean.” Liam added as he closed the door.

Niall shrugged, “just felt like trying a bit harder and doing something nice.” He mumbled quietly.

“What do you mean ‘try a bit harder’?” Liam asked confused as he took of his coat and tie and walked to the kitchen were Niall was taking out the pasta again.

“Nothing, I’m just being stupid, don’t worry.” Niall told him and smiled a bit.

Liam thought it was weird, but let it slip this time. “Oh,” he said then and walked until he was standing next to the blonde and pulled him by the waist, making Niall turn to look at him, so he placed a quick kiss to his lips, “hello” he smiled at him and Niall couldn’t help but smile back. Maybe he was wrong.

After sometime of cooking, which Liam used to tell Niall about this new case he had at the office and how he was planning on dealing with it. You see, Liam was in his last year of law school and had landed a job when he was starting his third year at some big firm. He himself and his boss, had discovered that he was damn good at it, so they decided to keep him, and now he was one of the best lawyers in there. Niall couldn’t be prouder, honestly.

Liam took some forks and knives, then glasses and put them on the table while Niall served the food.

“And how was your day?” Liam asked him while he took his a bit of his food.

“It was good, not as interesting as yours.” Niall shrugged.

“Why do you think my day was interesting?”

“Well… ‘cause you had this big case coming up and you’re excited and I know you can do it. Your job’s a lot more interesting than mine.”

“No, it’s not. Just different.”  Liam told him, “c’mon, tell me.”

“Alright.” Niall sighed and began talking, “remember I told you about this contest the magazine was organizing?” he asked and Liam nodded, “well, it’s happening, so I had to go to the office today to pick up a bunch of demos from bands and then came home and sat the entire afternoon to listen to them.”

“That’s pretty cool, at least you got to listen to a bunch of new music, Ni.”

“Yeah, some of them were pretty rad. Other on the other hand…” the blonde said with a face of ‘you wouldn’t believe the things I heard today’, making Liam laugh.

“Well, I don’t know that much about music like I do but I can help you if you want?” Liam offered.

“Yeah, that’d be good, I could do with some non-musical ear with this” Niall laughed.

The rest of the meal was spent chatting about a little bit of everything and nothing in general, just how their days went and what were their weeks going to be like.

Niall was in his last year of journalism, and as he knew a lot about music (and liked it a lot too), he got this job in a magazine where everything was about bands and instruments and music and stuff and he loved his job, if he was honest,  he even got to work from home too. Liam didn’t know that much about music but he loved the way Niall’s eyes shone when he discovered a new band or when he played it.

After they finished dinner and washed the dishes (cause Niall hated it when there were stuff to clean later, so he always washed the dishes right after eating) they moved to the living room to watch TV for a bit.

“You staying or are you going home?” Niall asked Liam, his head resting on the older boy’s shoulder.

Yes, you would think that after two years plus of being together, they should live together, but they were taking it slow still, so they both have their own flats, even though at this point they were both at Liam’s or Niall’s.

“Well…” Liam said thinking, “I should go home ‘cause there’s paper work in there that I’ll need tomorrow but I think I’ll stay the night and wake up a bit earlier tomorrow to go look for it at mine if you don’t mind?”

“I never mind you staying here to sleep with me, is that even a question?” Niall chuckled. “You won’t get up earlier though, sleepyhead.”

“Shush you, I will.”

It was midnight when they finally decided to head to bed, turning off all the lights in the flat and stripping out of their clothes and snuggling against each other and the blankets even though it was not winter and wasn’t even that cold yet.

Liam’s chest was against Niall’s back, his arm making his way around the blonde’s waist where said boy took it to hold it in his.

“Night, Ni.”

“Night, Liam, I love you.”

Liam said nothing, just placed a kiss on the back of his neck and squeezed his hand a bit before drifting off to sleep.

There. He didn’t say it back. But that didn’t mean anything, right?

*

It was exams week and Niall was so stressed within studying and work, he was now sick.

Liam had decided to “live” with Niall during the time he was sick in spite of the blonde’s complains telling him he was okay and that he could take care of himself. The older boy even tried to call in sick to work to stay with Niall but the blonde refused. He found his way to stay with him though. Liam 1 – Niall 0.

“I’m gonna make you some soup.”

“Noooo, I don’t want soup.” Niall mumbled with his head against the pillow.

“I know, but I don’t want you throwing up again, yeah?”

“But fooooood! Real food, Liam!”

Liam chuckled, “Uh uh, when you’re better I’ll get you your favorite food, but you need to get better first, okay? I promise.”

Niall let out a huff, “okay.”

So after Liam had made soup and they both had it in bed, Liam went to the kitchen again with a muffled yelled of Niall to him “you better leave my kitchen clean!” he couldn’t believe it, he was like this even when sick, unbelievable.

“You left everything clean and shiny in my kitchen, didn’t you?” Niall asked as Liam entered the room and sat next to him on the bed.

“’Course I did,” Liam said, rolling his eyes. “You feeling better?”

“Yeah. Don’t know why I’m feeling like this though.”

“Already told you, mister, you stress too much, you need to learn how to deal with it.” the older boy told him while lying next to him.

“I think I better not learn if I get you to skip work and classes to stay with me.”

“I’m sorry,” Liam said, feeling a bit guilty that he couldn’t find enough time to spend with his boyfriend, “I try to spend every spare moment with you.” he mumbled.

“Hey, hey,” Niall said, sensing Liam’s discomfort, “I know you do.” He smiled weakly at him.

“Let’s take a nap, yeah? I could use some more sleep.”

“You can always use some more sleep.” Niall laughed slightly.

“I like sleeping and so do you, that’s why we get on so well.” Liam laughed while pulling Niall closer, letting his hand wander under the blonde’s shirt and rubbing circles in his tummy.

Niall let out a content sigh and let his eyes close, “your hands are warm.” He commented and grabbed Liam’s hands in his.

“And yours are freezing!” Liam said and held Niall’s hands in his, then brought them to his lips to place a kiss on each one of them. “Come on, go to sleep, Ni.”

“Mhmm…” Niall said already a bit sleepy. “Thanks for staying, I love you.” he mumbled then against the skin of Liam’s neck a while later, but he got no answer, just Liam’s even breathing.

*

“You changed the picture in your nightstand,” Niall commented, taking a seat in Liam’s bed.

“Yeah, put the other one over there,” Liam said and pointed somewhere over his desk while brushing his teeth, making some of the foam in his mouth fall and stain his shirt. He looked down and let out a huff and went into the bathroom again as Niall laughed in the bedroom.

“Why did you change it though?” he asked when Liam entered the room again.

“Don’t know, wanted to put a new one on my desk at work and I couldn’t decide between this one and the one I have there now but then I decided that I wanted this one here but there’s already too much stuff on my nightstand so I moved the old one to my desk and let that new one in there.” Liam explained and almost running out of breath.

Niall just looked at him and blinked.

“What?” Liam asked.

“You’ve got a picture of us at work?”

“Well, yeah,” Liam said as if it was something obvious, “had one since we had our first picture together.”

“We weren’t even together when we took our first picture together.”

“Uh- well… then it’s been there longer than our relationship?” Liam commented.

“Oh my God, that’s so cute!” Niall said, standing up and going to hug and kiss his boyfriend.

“Yeah, yeah,” Liam said, trying to pull away from Niall’s embrace, “get off me!” he laughed.

“Seriously though, which one do you have in there?”

“The one we’re wearing suits, you know that one we had taken at my sister’s graduation from uni?”

“Yeah… it’s an okay picture, I guess.”

“Okay? Just okay? You look so good in that picture!”

“There’s nothing special in the way I look in that picture!” Niall exclaimed and chuckled, “well there’s nothing special in the way I look in general.”

“Hey! You look good in every picture we ever took ‘cause you’re handsome, you don’t need to look any special, you just are.”

“Shut up.” Niall blushed a bit and mumbled, slapping the older boy’s chest.

Liam laughed and changed the subject, “well, I really need to go now, see you at night?”

“Sure.” Niall said and Liam pecked him on the lips, then started making his way out of the room. “Liam?” he said then.

“Yeah?” Liam turned away to look at him.

“I love you.”

Liam gave him a small smile, “I know.”

_I KNOW?!_

*

Niall was in class, bored as hell when his phone vibrated in his pocket.

_From: Liam_

_‘I misssss uuuuu’_

Liam could be a lawyer and be all but if there was one thing and only one thing (because it was the only one, he swears) that he hated about Liam, it was the way he typed. Damn, that boy needed to learn how to write a message. Or a tweet. Or whatever that included typing on his phone.

_To: Liam_

_‘Miss you too. See you in a couple of hours tho, love you!’_

It took just a minute to receive an answer. He must be in a break from work or something.

_From: Liam_

_‘:)’_

Damn Liam.

That night, when he was back at his, he ordered chinese because he didn’t feel like cooking at all and he didn’t want to make Liam cook when he was out of his classes. He knew he was always tired and didn’t want to do anything when he was out of work or uni, and they hadn’t have chinese in a while, so why not?

“I bought you something.” Liam’s voice came.

“Fuck! You scared me, when the hell did you get in?”

“Three seconds ago,” Liam chuckled, “sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” he added before handing Niall two magazines, one with some irish band on the front cover, one that Niall had recently discovered but he was slowly getting into, and the other one had all the news about the Derby. He knew how much Niall loved it and how he had been missing the games because if he wasn’t working he was falling asleep while watching it.

“Oh, hey! Derby’s news!” the blonde exclaimed excited, “thanks, Li!”

“You’re welcome.”

“So what’s for dinner?”

“I ordered chinese, should be here any moment.” Niall said, barely paying attention to him, his whole attention in some article.

Niall had completely ignored Liam during dinner, not on purpose, but he was too caught up with reading the magazines Liam got him that he didn’t even notice when the plates where gone after dinner. And right now, there was a finger running up his spine.

“Liam, what are you doing?” He asked, wiggling around cause what Liam was doing was tickling him.

“You’re ignoring me.” Liam said in close to his ear.

“And you’re horny?”

“Well, shit, you’re making me feel bad about it, thanks, Ni.” Liam said with a huff and sat back down.

“Sorry, it’s just- it’s not the way it usually happens and it’s been a while and-“

“Oh God,” Liam said then, “did we actually get to that part of our relationship where we don’t even have sex anymore?!” he said faking a horrified face making Niall laugh.

“Let me finish reading this and then we can get to it.”

“My boyfriend chooses a magazine over me, unbelievable.” Liam said with a huff.

“I still love you!” Niall sing songed and made a kissy face.

“Yeah, yeah, sure you do.” Liam said mocking him.

“Hey, I d-“

“ _I know_ , Niall.”

*

“I don’t know, the whole fight scene seemed kind of… too acted.”

“How is a fight scene too acted?”

“I don’t know, I just didn’t like it that much.”

“I think it was pretty good, like, the movie was fine.”

“Yeah, it was, except for that scene.”

“Don’t be so hard on the poor guys, most of the people in this movie are new actors, I think they did good.”

“You and your superheroes movies… what am I going to do with you, huh?”

“Nothing because you love me like this.”

“I do.”

They walked a couple of blocks in silence after that, hand in hand.

“I think I’m going to take a taxi.”

“I’ll go with you and then come home then.”

“No! Are you crazy, you’re closer to yours from here, you don’t have to go all the way back to mine.”

“Just want to know if you get home okay.”

“I’ll be fine, I’m a big boy.”

“Okay then, whatever you say.” Liam said, throwing his hands in the air.

“I’ll see you tomorrow after work, okay?” Niall said and gave him a kiss.

“Alright.” Liam kissed him back. “I miss you already.” Another kiss.

“Shut up.” Niall giggled. _Giggled._

Niall stopped a taxi and placed another short kiss on Liam’s lips before getting into the cab and making his way home.

It wasn’t until he was getting into bed that he realized that he got a text.

_From: Liam_

_‘did u get home safe? :)’_

This was one of the things he loved most about Liam, how he was always so caring, making sure he was always okay.

_To: Liam_

_‘yes I did. See you tomorrow, love you xx’_

He was about to fall asleep when he got a reply.

_From: Liam_

_‘sleep tight ni, take care :)’_

Still no “I love you” from Liam.

*

Niall woke up to a very annoying buzzing from his phone on his nightstand. He groaned and rolled over to take it, to see he had a text from Liam

_From: Liam_

_‘morning babe, how are you today?’_

Why was Liam texting him so early, it was- eleven?! Shit. He overslept.

_To: Liam_

_‘overselpt. Your message just woke me up’_

He started his day in a rush, had a quick breakfast and changed into some clean clothes before going out.

_From: Liam_

_‘have a good day, ni :) see you tonite x’_

*

It was finally Friday and Liam was making his way to Niall’s flat to have dinner with him, and hopefully stay the whole weekend. The past week had been exhausting for him and he wanted nothing more than to spend some quality time with Niall.

He stopped at their favorite take out restaurant to buy Niall’s favorite food. He reckoned the blonde would order food anyways so he saved him that effort.

“I bought your favorite dish for dinner, Ni!” he called as he entered the flat, closing the door and leaving it in the small table by the door. “Niall?” he asked again when he got no response.

He walked into the blonde’s room to find him seating against the headboard, frowning and deep in concentration. He loved the concentrated look in his face but this one was just… wrong. Something was off with him.

“What’s wrong, love?”

Niall shook his head and looked at Liam who made his way towards the bed and sat next to him.

“I didn’t hear you coming in.”

“You miss out on my arrivals too often.” Liam laughed briefly but Niall didn’t. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Niall said shaking his head, “it’s stupid.”

“If it’s stupid then tell me.”

“No, really, Liam, it’s stupid.” Niall told him again, looking away.

“No, it’s not. You’re worried about something and you’re not looking at me, so tell me, what’s wrong?”

“You’re not gonna laugh?”

“I would never.” Liam said, putting his hand over his heart as if he was promising.

A minute passed in silence before Niall spoke. “Do you still love me?” he mumbled, well, more like, blurted out suddenly.

What?

“W- what?” Liam asked, confusion all over his face.

“Nothing, just- drop it.” Niall said again, looking down and went to stand up but Liam grabbed him by the wrist, making him sit down again.

“Why are you asking me that?”

“Do you?” Niall whispered.

“Of course I do, isn’t it clear enough?”

“You never say it.” Niall whispered again. He looked so small and fragile then. But how could he doubt him?

“I do!” Liam exclaimed because, what was happening? Everything was fine and now Niall was asking him this and just _what_.

“No, you don’t.”

Oh. _Oh_ , that’s when Liam got what Niall was trying to say.

“You think I don’t love you because I just don’t say the words anymore?”

“What other things are there to let me know, then?”

“Niall, Niall…” Liam shook his head with a small smile playing on his lips. “You’re not paying attention.”

The blonde frowned at that, “what?”

“It’s not like I don’t say the words anymore because I don’t love you, but you’re missing what I actually do. I feel like after all this time, saying ‘I love you’ is just not enough anymore,” he shrugged, “so what’s better than words? Actions. I show you every day, Ni, you just need to pay more attention.” He said and moved to sit a bit closer to his boyfriend, wrapping his arm around his waist. “Look, I always ask you how your day was cause I really want to know if you had a good one and if you had fun and because I could hear you talk for hours, and I always skip work or class when you don’t feel good even when you don’t want me too, cause I want, I _like_ taking care of you, cause I want you to be okay. I send you morning texts every morning, and I text you goodnight before I go to sleep _every night_. I randomly text you that I miss you during the day because I do and I feel like doing it. I buy things for you because they remind me of you when I see them, like irish stuff or dumb magazines. I always call you or text you to ask if you get home safe because I could never deal with it if something happened to you. I even told you I’ve got a picture of us in my desk longer than we’ve been together! That’s my way of showing you I care about you and-”

“Liam, I-“

“Sh sh, I’m on a rant now.” Liam shushed him putting a finger against his lips, “I love how your hands are always cold because it gives me an excuse to hold them a bit longer. And I love the way your eyes sparkle when you play guitar or listen to a song you like, or when we buy your favorite food, which I did tonight, by the way.” He said and there was that sparkle. “See! Your eyes did the thing again!” he laughed.

“It’s not because of the food, silly!”

“Are you suuuure?” Liam asked, squinting his eyes at Niall.

“I’m sorry.” Niall said, ignoring Liam’s question and feeling a little guilty for making Liam feel like he had to explain, and even a bit stupid for not having seen all Liam does for him everyday.

“You don’t have to be, sometimes I forget that I need to remember you that I do, not big deal, I just don’t want you doubting about my feelings for you.”

“I promise to pay more attention, which also makes me feel like shit ‘cause I don’t do any cute stuff for you, I’m horrible.”

“Yes, you do, you let me cuddle you and feed you and spoil you all the time, that’s all I need if I’m honest.”

“Jesus, I feel so stupid.” Niall laughed and let his back hit the headboard.

“Why didn’t you just talk to me?” Liam asked now curious.

“’Cause I knew I’d feel stupid!”

“Nah, Niall, after all this time we’ve been together? You should be able to talk to me without feeling like I’m going to laugh at you, you know I wouldn’t.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I do trust you.” Niall smiled at him, getting another smile in return from Liam.

“I know you do. Now… I wanted to wait a bit and take you out for dinner or go somewhere to ask this but I guess now would be a good time for reassurance.” Liam said and Niall’s eyes went wide. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Liam… what are you going to ask me…?” he said, his voice slightly shaking.

“Huh? Why do you look so worked up- oh,” Liam realized, “no, no, I’m not gonna ask you to marry me if that’s what  you were wondering,” he laughed, “and shit, good thing I didn’t ask cause you should’ve seen your face, thanks for wanting to marry me, geez.”

“No, it’s just-“

“I know, I know, too early. I’m saving that for the future.” Liam winked at him and Niall slapped him in the shoulder playfully. “What I wanted to ask you is… uhm, I want you to move in with me.”

Niall looked at him in the eye for a couple of seconds and then a smile appeared on his face, “Really?”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t be asking if I didn’t want you to.” He explained, “I just think that it’d be a lot more practical, seeing that I’m always here or that you’re always at mine, so why not moving together, you know? I was also thinking you could move to mine ‘cause it’s a bit bigger than this, but if you want to keep this flat I wouldn’t mind moving in here. Or we can look for a new flat.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, oh God, why is it so hard to believe it? We’ve been together for like two years already!”

“Two years and three months.”

“Two years and three months, really?!” Liam exclaimed, “wow, I’m really bad at keeping count,” he laughed, “whatever, I just want to have _our_ flat, and the kitchen to be _our_ kitchen, and the bed to be _our_ bed, not yours or mine, you know what I mean?”

“Yeah…”

“So what do you say?”

“Is that even a question? Of course I want to!” Niall exclaimed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and his arms flew to wrap around Liam’s shoulders. “I’d like to buy a new house though.”

“Okay, whatever you want, babe. We’ll start looking around soon.”

“Thanks, Liam, you’re the best.” The blonde whispered and kissed him on the lips.

“I love you.”

Niall smiled at that, “ _I know._ ”

“Fucker.” Liam laughed, shaking his head.

**Author's Note:**

> please don't be so hard on me, I told you this was old!!  
> my url is niamverse on tumblr in case someone wants to talk to me or something in there. (:


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